Friday, February 26, 2010

Kids say the darndest things

Me: "Who can name one of the plays that Shakespeare wrote?"
Student: "James and the Giant Peach?"


Student in the cafeteria: "Look how crowded we are at our table, Mrs. Matheson! It's like we're in a neutrino star!"


Student: "Okay, I've gone brain loss. How do you spell bird?"
Me: "B-I-R-D."
Student, stomping foot: "Gosh! I spelled it wrong both times!"

Tuesday, January 26, 2010

family history FTW

So...maybe it's been nigh on 8 months since I posted. Now I'm teaching school, and I like it most of the time, and I'm still alive. But HOLY CRAP I'VE FINALLY GOT SOMETHING TO WRITE HOME ABOUT--have you seen this website??

I started poking around down some family history lines, moving back on my mom's mom's mom's side (and so on down the mothers' lines). Did anyone ever tell you that family history gets very, very easy if you're related to royalty? Monarchs had lots of people keeping track of their genealogy, apparently. Here's the route I traced:

Cathryn
my mom's mom's family
a whole bunch of other British-sounding names, who suddenly turned in to...
Scottish kings (who married...)
Gaelic kings (who were preceded by the...)
Gothic kings (who were preceded by...)
Kings from northern Africa--Libya, Scythia (?), Egypt (who are apparently linked to the...)
Judaic kings

...and things loop around a whole lot from there. But guess what the Judaic kings had written about themselves? THE FREAKING OLD TESTAMENT.

I can trace my family history back to Adam--person by person by person. Look (click on it for a bigger pic):


I think Japheth's kids became the Goths/Gauls/Gaelics--if you can't read it, it says right there that his son Magog was called "Father of the Irish."

MIND. BLOWN.




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Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Evidence that I need to teach parts of speech

Sample sentences from a student's (7th grade) vocabulary practice:

"I was rideing my bike then I obliterated."
"The swine flu is rampant."
"Mr. Nix is vigor today."
"I went home and usurp."
"I'am allways salient."
"I am Amenities in my bed."
"Taylor Swift is gaunt."
"I have been treachery with japan."
"I am daunted of ghoust."
"Wraith are at the ghost yard."

Clearly my students understand two things: the swine flu and Taylor Swift.

Friday, August 28, 2009

First Week of School

Insanely busy. I adore my kids. I fall asleep smiling...but I fall asleep FAST. :-)

Sunday, August 16, 2009

Moving Day

I had been counting down to Saturday literally all summer: it was The Day when we were allowed to move into the school building, which was to have been completed the day before (Friday, August 14). Well, things sort of went according to plan. We got the keys to the place and a "certificate of occupancy" for the building on Thursday, meaning we were allowed to walk inside. And it looks like a building, more or less. But the carpet isn't finished, or the ceiling, or the tile on the walls, or the paint, or...you get the idea. I really hope Ernie (principal and captain of the good ship Excelsior) is going to hold the contractors to it, because I really don't know how to install a ceiling sprinkler system myself. (Which my room still needs.) Did I mention that school starts in a week?

Well, so Saturday came around, and we were given the ok to move things in even though the building wasn't quite finished. I was so incredibly excited. Scott and I loaded our little car floor-to-ceiling (literally--there were tissue boxes at my feet and stacks of construction paper on my lap as we drove) with teacher stuff and we made the 40 minute trek to Erda, Utah. It was kind of a madhouse when we got there, since it also happened to be the run-through of the morning dropoff procedure and registration.

(Sorry, I never finished this post. It turned out that we got everything in and settled just fine, and the school was miraculously finished enough to have kids come in on the first day. Everything else was pretty much polished off within two weeks. Yay for a beautiful new building!)

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Out of the Best Books

Today I started reading a book called Reviving Ophelia. It's been on my reading list since I stumbled across it when I was working on a research paper for a college class a couple of years ago. The other day I picked up a copy of it at D.I. while I was browsing for other books to get for my classroom and I couldn't put it down. I stood in the aisle between the adult paperbacks and the children's picture books for the better part of half an hour, reading a random chapter I had flipped to somewhere in the middle of the book.

The subtitle and tag line of the book are "Saving the Selves of Adolescent Girls: An eye-opening look at the everyday dangers of being young and female and how adults can help." It's written by a clinical psychologist who specializes in working with teenagers. Don't worry--it's not half as didactic as it sounds; quite the contrary. Mary Pipher begins the book asking why she is seeing so many more girls in therapy today (the book was first published in 1994) than she did twenty years past, and asking why the girls she sees now are so much more deeply troubled than they seemed to be a generation ago. She says,
"Reviving Ophelia is my attempt to understand my experiences in therapy with adolescent girls. Many girls come into therapy with serious, even life-threatening, problems, such as anorexia or the desire to physically hurt or kill themselves. Others have problems less dangerous but still puzzling, such as school refusal, underachievement, moodiness or constant discord with their parents. Many are the victims of sexual violence. ... [Even my daughter] and her friends were riding a roller coaster. Sometimes they were happy and interested in their world; other times they just seemed wrecked. They were hard on their families and each other. Particularly junior high seemed like a crucible. Many confident, well-adjusted girls were transformed into sad and angry failures. ...

"At first blush, it seems things should be better now [than a generation ago]. After all, we have the women's movement. Hasn't that helped? The answer, as I think about it, is yes and no. ... Many of us are doing things our mothers never dreamed of doing. But girls today are much more oppressed. They are coming of age in a more dangerous, sexualized and media-saturated culture. They face incredible pressures to be beautiful and sophisticated, which in junior high means using chemicals and being sexual. As they navigate a more dangerous world, girls are less protected.

"As I looked at the culture that girls enter as they come of age, I was struck by what a girl-poisoning culture it was. The more I loked around, the more I listened to today's music, watched television and movies and looked at sexist advertising, the more convinced I became that we are on the wrong path with our daughters. America today limits girls' development, truncates their wholeness and leaves many of them traumatized."
(And I don't mean to sound alarmist or sensationalist here, but I can swear to you that if you feel like Pipher is exaggerating here, then you haven't spent much time in a junior high lately.)

The last paragraph of Dr. Pipher's preface really got to me. It reads,
"What can we do to help them? We can strengthen girls so that they will be ready. We can encourage emotional toughness and self-protection. We can support and guide them. But most important [sic], we can change our culture. We can work together to build a culture that is less complicated and more nurturing, less violent and sexualized and more growth-producing. Our daughters deserve a society in which all their gifts can be developed and appreciated."
As their English teacher, I recognize my role as one of the main, sometimes the only, purveyor of printed culture in my students' lives. I feel a strong sense of responsibility for choosing books that will help accomplish these aims--building a culture and a taste for literature that is "less complicated and more nurturing, less violent and sexualized and more growth-producing." And yet, as I went over the book units I'd tentatively selected for my sixth graders, I started to worry.

Three of the titles are not my choice. They are mandated by the curriculum program our school has chosen: The Iliad, The Odyssey, and Shakespeare's Julius Caesar. (I know, right? "For sixth graders? Really?" Yes, apparently.) Complicated? Violent? Sexualized? Check, check, check.

But it got even worse as I considered the books I had personally selected, books that are widely accepted as actually being grade-level appropriate for sixth graders: Maniac Magee by Jerry Spinelli and The Giver by Lois Lowry. Mind you, I had not chosen these books arbitrarily or without forethought. I wanted literature that would be engaging and relevant to my students. I wanted main characters who were close to my students' age and who asked the same kinds of questions about the world as my students do. I wanted books that were less violent and more interpersonal than the mandated titles. And, probably most importantly, I wanted good, engaging stories that could help even my most reluctant readers feel more comfortable about picking up a book. The two I settled on, in my mind, accomplished all of these goals.

But where on earth are the girls? No, seriously--where are the female role models? Heavens, where are the females? As I read the introduction to Reviving Ophelia, I quickly realized that my book list needed some serious revision. None of these books have a female protagonist. In fact, there are almost no female characters at all! Sure, Odysseus' wife Penelope makes a few short appearances, and a handful of other girls drift from page to page in the other books. But nowhere to be found was the kind of young woman that a girl in one of my classes could look up to. Nowhere was there a "nurturing...growth-producing" storyline or even a small, uplifting female character sketch to help combat the violence and--yes, I dare say it--blatant male chauvanism in the required readings.

How had I done this? I had worked hard to think of my critical groups: racial minorities (check, sort of, in Maniac Magee), reluctant readers (who are, much more often than not, boys), unskilled readers (neither of my book choices are technically difficult), and so forth. But I had neglected to listen to the voices of at least half of my students--the young women who, in my projected classroom, would be force-fed an entire year of "boy books" because their teacher knew that girls will read a book with a male protagonist much more willingly than boys will pick up a book about a girl. Shame on me.

So now I'm back to the drawing board. I need a book (or several) that's both appropriate for sixth graders and that will help me "build a culture that is less complicated and more nurturing, less violent and sexualized and more growth-producing"--these phrases keep ringing in my mind. And yet I worry that my English teachers of the past (and even my college professors) have fallen into the same trap I did: I can't think of a single book I read in a junior high or high school English class that would fit the bill. These kids are way too young for Speak; I don't want to serve them fluff like that Meg Cabot garbage; and--call me crazy--I don't want to teach a fantasy novel, no matter how much anyone may like Ella Enchanted or Princess Academy. I want real girls who live in roughly the same Seventeen Magazine-saturated world as my students and who still make it out okay. I'm thinking of replacing Maniac Magee with Stargirl--same author, similar tone, much more true to these concerns. But I worry that high schoolers Leo and Stargirl are a tad too old for eleven-year-olds.

Help? Please?

(Oh, and I could use the same advice for my seventh graders, too. At least they have to read Diary of a Young Girl by Anne Frank. It's a start...?)

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

To Do

I've been working on THE LIST all month now, and it's not dwindling nearly as fast as I would like.


TO DO BEFORE MOVE-IN (hopefully!) and thereafter:
figure out insurance & enroll (submit forms)
get copy of 6th & 7th CRT & adjust plans accordingly
6th curriculum map (forward to all MS)
7th curriculum map (forward to all MS)
select texts (consult with Tass)
order class sets (consult with Ernie)
build writing units & start assignment sheets, examples, rubrics
articulate routines & build materials
plan & prep for first week
determine necessary student materials (consult with Alan)
finish PIP, post, email (consult with Ernie)
clean up website
email parents
go shopping
sprout plant
build preassessments list based on curriculum map (consult with Alan)
create/write posters and routines documents
print off posters (@ mom's house?) and teacher discount cards (FRIDAY)
get/cut down cork boards, adhesives, stuffed animals, etc. at home (FRIDAY)
Finish painting bookshelves
clean stool, sorting shelves, brown lamp, art supply boxes
clean, fix, paint? small table
prep paperbacks (de-sticker, clean, label, sort, index)
get misc stuff to bring into drawers/boxes (clean out/sort car trunk)
Make a hall pass object

TO DO DURING MOVE-IN:
hack out schedule with Wayne & Terese & company
assemble posters and routines materials
Laminating/copies:
UPS Store—772 N Main (435-833-0501) 27” wide $1.00/foot soft
Copy Cottage—220 Millpond Ste 104 Stansbury (435-843-9945) $1.50 a foot soft 26” wide
Jackrabbit Press—272 N Broadway (435-840-0679) $1.25/foot soft 26” wide
work on getting 2 student computers (and a table for them)--craigslist!
try to get info on ELL/IEP students ASAP!